She's as vain as me, she loves to be dressed up in clothes, with her hair tied up in diff colours of ribbons everyday, in diff styles.
She's the main distraction,with that extremely adorable face of hers, the one to be blamed whenever i cant concentrate on my revisions, always running off to play with her.
She's the one whom i tease with all sorts of names, lil princess, our baby, the spoiled brat, chubby,to whatever names i can associate with chubby and cuteness. cause she's all that.
She's the one that won a beauty pageant contest and was featured in the Star Newspaper.
She's the apple of the eye, the main joy giver at home, never fails to cheer me up whenever im down, just by looking at her, the way she sleeps, with her tongue always sticking out, her groggy face, just by talking to her, telling her my secrets, just by having her jump up and greet me.
Like a baby, despite having her for 7 years already, each and everyday, she never fails to amuse us with something new.
She's the epitome of cute, how i see her in everything cute stuff i see, how it reminded me of her.
She's friggin smart, she does high fives and tens, she shakes hands,all that we've trained her ever since she was a puppy. She's even trained on her toilet habits.
She loves to hear me read aloud, she loves the sound of the piano and guitar .
Superbly Cute and pretty is an understatement for her.
She's the centre of attention whenever visitors come to my house.
Everybody loves her, even ppl whose afraid of dogs.
She's not a dog in our family. she's a family member, our youngest member in the family.
And all that is history now, the heart wrenching fact, the harsh reality which im not willing to accept, hoping that i'll wake up from this dream. so, pinch me.
The whole house is weighed down with her absence.
Heavy silence of unspoken grief.
I know i'll wake up in the morning, just like i did this morning,with tears rolling down uncontrollably, having to realize all over again, that she's never coming back anymore.
I wont see her greeting me in the morning, excitedly wagging her tail.
I wont see her accompanying me throughout my late nights loyally, when everyone else's asleep in the household.
I wont have her clinging to me whenever lightning and thunderstorms frightened her.
I wont have her following my heels to the door, or greeting me enthusiastically whenever i go in and out of the house.
I'll never have to wonder what colour of a ribbon she's wearing today while im in school.
I'll never feel that satisfying weight of hers in my arms.
I'll never have her soft fur to snuggle into again.
I'll never have anyone to baby talk to again.
And now, whenever i eat my food, to the last piece of whatever's left, it feels weird not having anyone to pester me for it, cause the greedy girl's not around anymore.
Everywhere i go in the hse, her presence lingers, as if she's still there, like every other day, with her toys and clothes lying around, smelling of her.
But the fact is, she's not, and she's never coming back again.
I'll never see her peeking from the car window, whenever mum fetches me from tuitions.
I never knew that would be my last time seeing her when mum and sis sent her to the clinic, as we thought she was juz normally ill.
I've never lost someone so dear to me in my entire life before, so closely knitted and directly attached to.
She plays a huge role in every way in my life as well as my family's.
and now i finally know how ppl break down when they went to identify their loved ones' body.
God, it hurts like crap, right to the core, with the pain and sorrow squeezing the hell outta you.
My eyes and face feel sore from all the crying and tissues.Cant remember when's the last time i cried this hard.
Things only get worse when im in the middle of the crappy SPM trials. I cant seem to focus.No matter how hard to try to pull myself together, my thoughts will always stray and i'll find myself breaking down in hysterical sobs again. gosh.
I miss her terribly, i dont want anything else ,i only want her back again.
Tell me how am i gonna pull myself through this mess.
i pray that she's all safe and sound with God in heaven now, leading a way better life than she did before.